Suspicious minds
May 8, 2008 — geohdeIn summary, The Scan today revealed no items to overly twist my panties over. And I’m VERY talented at finding reasons to knot knickers…
Despite this I can’t quite shake that nagging instinct to fix my metaphorical gaze upwards, in search of that other damn shoe. It has to drop SOMETIME…
Today’s scan was relatively routine, complete with the now traditional red-faced radiologist explaining in exhaustive detail how clean and sterile and sheathed in a glove the vaginal probe is (to my exposed perineum) whilst I cheerfully responded that as long as I got warning if needles were attached, I wasn’t known for my fussiness over what ends up Up There. Heck, I can’t even see what’s going on Up There any more, courtesy of The Fetii comprehensively blocking my view. Neither can I see to attend to matters of a more grooming nature in anticipation of aforementioned girly bits exposure. Not that a minor matter like lack of vision prevents me from doing my razor-waving best purely by morse code, of course.
Goodness knows what the poor man was confronted with, really.
Anyway, it appears that my cervix has been smuggling an extra two and a bit centimetres out of digit reach. Either that, or I’ve stuffed up and picked a stumpy-fingered OB.
Presumably this means that I shan’t be shooting up steroids (strictly for medical reasons, of course) at my next OB visit, to the relief of all concerned. Of course, given the multiple risk factors for pre-term delivery I appear to have collected (let alone the fact that I can barely move without doubling over in Contractile Distress), the bed/couch remains a Good Place to park my ever-expanding butt.
As for the non-cervical items, both Fetii continue to grow like beings with no concept of being in a container of ultimately finite proportions. Foetus B actually yawned with boredom whilst in her rather uncomfortable looking jack-knifed feet-behind-the-ears position. Presumably there’s no cable or ‘net in (my base model) uterus.
If it wasn’t for all the uterine misbehaviour, bringing with it an ever-present reminder that things reserve the right to change without notice, I’d probably be obnoxiously observing just how easy this whole pregnancy thing is, after all.

















